My · Dream · Book

Day 2. Sunday, July 16, 2006

10:15 AM: Arrive at home of abandoned dogs. Easily locate cage… I left the light on. Take them for walkies. Try to get large main dog to go back outside for the day. He said, “Hell no,” as he ran downstairs to hide next to the small auxiliary dog in the cage. Fine. I am late.
11:03 AM: Punch in just before the 4 minute damn-you’re-late time. So much for a raise anytime soon.
3 PM: Where the hell is Jullian?
3:15 PM: Jullian heads to The Chief’s “office” and yaks on cell phone until 3:45 PM.
3:45 PM: It occurs to Rah that someone may try and make her close… again.
4 PM: “I am going to try and work for a few minutes, but I don’t think I can handle it. I have already talked to Rick. Can you close for me?” “No,” was as nice as I could be at that time. “I am sick and have to make sure the dogs are ok.”
4:30 PM: lunch
5:30 PM: “I think I am going to go ahead and leave.” “No you’re not.” “Yes, I am stressed out and I am losing my concentration.” “There is nothing to concentrate on! What is wrong with you? Are you sick?” “No, I am under stress and my blood pressure is up.” “You are making my blood pressure go up!”
6 PM: “Margot wants to talk to you.”
6:05 PM: I wind up getting cranky with Margot. Turns out she told them something different. I never said I would stay. Dee asks what was wrong with her. I told her what I was told. “Huh,” they said. They gave me one hour to get to the home of abandoned dogs, feeds them and return to work. Dammit. I growl at Jullian as I leave, “We are not friends.”
6:30 PM arrive at home of cute puppies and feed them. Lizzie likes my lasp and tummy scratchings. So much so that if you stop scratching she will put a paw in your eye to let you know that you stopped. Just in case you weren’t aware of it.
7:15 PM: back at work. Grumpy. Apologize to Dee and Margot for my crankiness earlier. Margot said not to worry, but that she would like to try the too-stressed-to-work approach on Rick later. This made me giggle and feel better.
11:20 PM: crawl my unhappy ass into my home, retrieve beer, a Sarah Daisy and a cigarette. That’s when I found out I missed being to see Summer AND the Weeds marathon. DAMN YOU JULLIAN AND YOUR STUPID STRESS!!!
12:40 AM: Write angry blogs about my day. Go to bed hoping girlfriend would call. I needed a hug.

The Journal of a Dog Sitter


Day 1: Saturday, July 15, 2006

8:01 AM: Alarm goes off. I hit the snooze.
8:05 AM: Alarm goes off. I hit the snooze.
8:09 AM: Alarm goes off. I am aware that my sore throat has turned into nausea as well, and I may also have a fever. I hit the snooze.
8:14 AM: Alarm goes off. My cat has had enough of sleeping alone and wedges himself between me and my girlfriend. My girlfriend rolls over and squishes my cat. I rescue my cat. I hit the snooze.
8:19 AM: Alarm goes off. Dog wakes up. Cat won’t move. Girlfriend cracks and eye. I reset alarm for girlfriend. Kiss girlfriend, cat and dog. Scratch Dog’s tummy. I get up, take medicine and get ready for work.
8:30 AM: The Rah has left the building.
8:50 AM: Arrive at home of abandoned dogs. Large main dog greats me with enthusiastic tail wagging and much whining. He lightens up when he realizes I may let him into the house.
8:51 AM: Fumble with keys for waaaaaaay too long. You know, the key for the trash compactor at work just isn’t the same as the key to the deadbolt. Huh. Go figure.
8:52 AM: Enter the home of… wtf mate? Where are all the lights? I can hear the dogs, but I sure as hell can’t see them. I flip many switches before foraging blindly into the unknown; i.e. the basement. Let dogs out of cage. Made mental note to bring flashlight on return trip.
8:55 AM: Find appropriate leashes for dogs. Leashed small auxiliary dog anyway, she didn’t seem to care. Suddenly, I am aware of a monotonous noise. It seemed to be coming from the alarm area. This could be bad. Quickly I scan my brain using Microsoft Rah 2006 for any information involving an alarm, or codes to go to said alarm. Files Not Found. “Ready” blinked the alarm display. “Beep Beep Beep Beep…” said the alarm.
Walked dogs anyway. They were more interested in Mommy’s truck than walkies.
9:10 AM: Get back to the house and cross fingers that beeping has ceased. Nope. Once again using Microsoft Rah 2006 I locate a folder that said, “Doggie Instructions.” Ha! There is a note in the glove box with phone numbers. I call one of them. No answer. I then determine that the odds of a teenager on vacation being up before noon are 5,646,149 to 1. I call the daughter anyway. No answer. So I leave a message that went something like this: “”Hi, this is BEEP Rah, the dog BEEP sitter. There is BEEP something beeping at BEEP me and I BEEP was never given BEEP codes and hope BEEP that it is BEEP ok to leave BEEP it because I BEEP am late for BEEP work.”
10:03 AM: Explain to co-workers conundrum of tripping alarm. Found voicemail from the daughter. Got the code. Suddenly there was a need for yeast from store #551. Cool. Hauled ass to house and turned alarm off. Bust a move to find store #551. The directions I was given SUCKED. Got lost. Turned around to head back to my own store. Got the hang of the clutch by now.
10:55 AM: Back at home base. I was informed that Manager Terri was looking for me wanting to know if I would close. My sensitive and caring answer to this was, “Hell no.” She talked poor little Kristin into doing it.
11:05 AM: Back into the swing of things. Still looking for supply orders. As I look into the flippy top box, just one more time I stand up in disgust. CLANG!!! That was my head making direct and forceful contact with the metal girder above the flippy top box. I try to shake it off and hope no one saw it. “I saw that,” said the Produce Guy. I have done it before too, except I cussed more.
12 PM: Marilyn came to me, “I have made you a casserole of chicken. There are green beans in a plastic container. I wanted to make you banana bread, but I ran out of banana, so I made muffins instead.” “Did you just make a ton of stuff or did you make this all for me?” “Made it for you.” Awwwww. She follwed with explixit re-heating instructions.
4 PM: Lunch. Head hurts.
4:30 PM: Begin the Cliff’s Notes version of Closing 101 for Kristin.
5:30 PM: clean the floor, drains and dishes so she wouldn’t have to worry about it.
6 PM: Clock out and go to get Suzie so she can see the cute puppies.
7 PM: Discover a disturbing silence. That would be because there was NO POWER on at the home of the abandoned dogs. Man, this day just keeps getting better. Using my phone as a light, because Microsoft Rah 2006 crashed like it does every day and forgot the flashlight from home, I attempt to search for the breaker box. It two dykes 30 minutes to determine that one did not exist.
Walk dogs anyway. Sweaty. Turns out whole neighborhood is out. We leave them determined to come back later to make sure they are ok.
9:30 PM: Bring girlfriend to meet the cute puppies. Electricity back on. Girlfriend finds the breaker box. Of course, the sensitive artist can do it, but the electrician could not. I hung my head in shame. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Welcome.
If you are reading this then you have started on the first leg of my book writing journey. I have finally decided to go for it. I will post stories from my life at random, from random times. In the end, years from now, I am sure, I will hopefull have something I can at leat get bound at Kinkos.

Please feel free to comment, but not steal.

Happy reading!

-Rah